Golden Globes (here without the condom)
Just as boring as your corporate Christmas party, but you gotta show, helas. Every self-respecting cinema lover will sit annually through at least one of these painfully long praise the lord acceptance speeches to see if your favorite films got their moment in the sun. And not to be cynic, but we are genuinely happy for the winners, who stumble-rumble on stage, red cheeks, holding on to the new trophy, waving it through the air like a meat tenderizer on speed.
We are there to see what the stars are wearing, WHO shows up and who is MIA. Yesterday, Woody Allen was shining in absentia and Jennifer Aniston didn’t join the party, the golden girl, not even as announcer. Yes, we noticed. She was replaced by Reese.
It’s a long evening. A sacrifice we are willing to make, just like lambs that get slaughtered for the High Holidays. Filmfare or IIFA is more fun than the Golden Globes, for who understands hindi. Those who don’t understand hindi, don’t know these exist and if they do, probably wouldn’t be interested in their existence, unless they are Bollywood addicts like me or have invested money.. And I can tell you, they are missing out on a lot of fun! Just think of the year Akshay did his Singh is King gig, let me see if I can find it..
oh okay it was at the IIFA, the International Indian Film Academy Awards in 2008. The film was a flop at the box office and Akki with his great sense of humor in his intro complains to his mom about it: (or maybe he complains about his last film that flopped? could someone be so kind to translate what he says..?)
NOW, THAT’S A PARTY!
…here is the second part, if you liked the first:
I beg thee, dear members of the Academy, the Oscar’s, Golden Globes or Foreign Press, to invite Akshay Kumar one year!
So what did I take home yesterday at the Golden Globes? Ricky Gervais shouldn’t be invited anymore. Angelina’s lipstick was too red. Jessica Lange was too cranky. Older women should stay away from showing their bare backs, cuz the face-lift clashes with the wrinkle rear. I don’t know if I am crazy about the movie that won best picture. I thought it was just an okay kinda movie. I still didn’t watch A Separation. I was happy for The Artist team, joined by their dog. I was glad when it was over. And These were the proud winners and nominees:
Best Motion Picture – Drama
WINNER
The Descendants (2011)
Other Nominees:
The Help (2011)
Hugo (2011/II)
The Ides of March (2011)
Moneyball (2011)
War Horse (2011)
Best Motion Picture – Musical or Comedy
WINNER
The Artist (2011)
Other Nominees:
Bridesmaids (2011)
50/50 (2011)
Midnight in Paris (2011)
My Week with Marilyn (2011)
Best Performance by an Actor in a Motion Picture – Drama
WINNER
George Clooney for The Descendants (2011)
Other Nominees:
Leonardo DiCaprio for J. Edgar (2011)
Michael Fassbender for Shame (2011)
Ryan Gosling for The Ides of March (2011)
Best Performance by an Actress in a Motion Picture – Drama
WINNER
Meryl Streep for The Iron Lady (2011)
Other Nominees:
Glenn Close for Albert Nobbs (2011)
Viola Davis for The Help (2011)
Rooney Mara for The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo (2011)
Tilda Swinton for We Need to Talk About Kevin (2011)
Best Performance by an Actor in a Motion Picture – Musical or Comedy
WINNER
Jean Dujardin for The Artist (2011)
Other Nominees:
Brendan Gleeson for The Guard (2011)
Joseph Gordon-Levitt for 50/50 (2011)
Ryan Gosling for Crazy, Stupid, Love. (2011)
Owen Wilson for Midnight in Paris (2011)
Best Performance by an Actress in a Motion Picture – Musical or Comedy
WINNER
Michelle Williams for My Week with Marilyn (2011)
Other Nominees:
Jodie Foster for Carnage (2011)
Charlize Theron for Young Adult (2011)
Kristen Wiig for Bridesmaids (2011)
Kate Winslet for Carnage (2011)
Best Performance by an Actor in a Supporting Role in a Motion Picture
WINNER
Christopher Plummer for Beginners (2010)
Other Nominees:
Kenneth Branagh for My Week with Marilyn (2011)
Albert Brooks for Drive (2011)
Jonah Hill for Moneyball (2011)
Viggo Mortensen for A Dangerous Method (2011)
Best Performance by an Actress in a Supporting Role in a Motion Picture
WINNER
Octavia Spencer for The Help (2011)
Other Nominees:
Bérénice Bejo for The Artist (2011)
Jessica Chastain for The Help (2011)
Janet McTeer for Albert Nobbs (2011)
Shailene Woodley for The Descendants (2011)
Best Director – Motion Picture
WINNER
Martin Scorsese for Hugo (2011/II)
Other Nominees:
Woody Allen for Midnight in Paris (2011)
George Clooney for The Ides of March (2011)
Michel Hazanavicius for The Artist (2011)
Alexander Payne for The Descendants (2011)
Best Screenplay – Motion Picture
WINNER
Midnight in Paris (2011): Woody Allen
Other Nominees:
The Artist (2011): Michel Hazanavicius
The Descendants (2011): Alexander Payne, Nat Faxon, Jim Rash
Moneyball (2011): Steven Zaillian, Aaron Sorkin, Stan Chervin
Best Original Song – Motion Picture
Other Nominees:
Albert Nobbs (2011): Brian Byrne, Glenn Close(“Lay Your Head Down”)
Gnomeo & Juliet (2011): Elton John, Bernie Taupin(“Hello Hello”)
The Help (2011): Mary J. Blige, Thomas Newman, Harvey Mason Jr., Damon Thomas(“The Living Proof”)
Machine Gun Preacher (2011): Chris Cornell(“The Keeper”)
Best Original Score – Motion Picture
WINNER
The Artist (2011): Ludovic Bource
Other Nominees:
Hugo (2011/II): Howard Shore
War Horse (2011): John Williams
W.E. (2011): Abel Korzeniowski
Best Animated Film
WINNER
The Adventures of Tintin (2011)
Best Foreign Language Film
WINNER
A Separation (2011)(Iran)
Other Nominees:
The Flowers of War (2011)(China)
In the Land of Blood and Honey (2011)(USA)
The Kid with a Bike (2011)(Belgium)
The Skin I Live In (2011)(Spain)
Best Television Series – Drama
WINNER
“Homeland” (2011)
Other Nominees:
“American Horror Story” (2011)
“Boardwalk Empire” (2010)
“Boss” (2011)
“Game of Thrones” (2011)
Best Television Series – Musical or Comedy
WINNER
“Modern Family” (2009)
Best Mini-Series or Motion Picture Made for Television
WINNER
“Downton Abbey” (2010)
Other Nominees:
Cinema Verite (2011) (TV)
“The Hour” (2011)
“Mildred Pierce” (2011)
Too Big to Fail (2011) (TV)
Best Performance by an Actor in a Television Series – Drama
WINNER
Kelsey Grammer for “Boss” (2011)
Other Nominees:
Steve Buscemi for “Boardwalk Empire” (2010)
Bryan Cranston for “Breaking Bad” (2008)
Jeremy Irons for “The Borgias” (2011)
Damian Lewis for “Homeland” (2011)
Best Performance by an Actress in a Television Series – Drama
WINNER
Claire Danes for “Homeland” (2011)
Other Nominees:
Mireille Enos for “The Killing” (2011)
Julianna Margulies for “The Good Wife” (2009)
Madeleine Stowe for “Revenge” (2011)
Callie Thorne for “Necessary Roughness” (2011)
Best Performance by an Actor in a Television Series – Musical or Comedy
WINNER
Matt LeBlanc for “Episodes” (2011)
Other Nominees:
Alec Baldwin for “30 Rock” (2006)
David Duchovny for “Californication” (2007)
Johnny Galecki for “The Big Bang Theory” (2007)
Thomas Jane for “Hung” (2009)
Best Performance by an Actress in a Television Series – Musical or Comedy
WINNER
Laura Dern for “Enlightened” (2011)
Other Nominees:
Zooey Deschanel for “New Girl” (2011)
Laura Linney for “The Big C” (2010)
Amy Poehler for “Parks and Recreation” (2009)
Best Performance by an Actor in a Mini-Series or a Motion Picture Made for Television
WINNER
Idris Elba for “Luther” (2010)
Other Nominees:
Hugh Bonneville for “Downton Abbey” (2010)
William Hurt for Too Big to Fail (2011) (TV)
Bill Nighy for Page Eight (2011) (TV)
Dominic West for “The Hour” (2011)
Best Performance by an Actress in a Mini-Series or a Motion Picture Made for Television
WINNER
Kate Winslet for “Mildred Pierce” (2011)
Other Nominees:
Romola Garai for “The Hour” (2011)
Diane Lane for Cinema Verite (2011) (TV)
Elizabeth McGovern for “Downton Abbey” (2010)
Emily Watson for “Appropriate Adult” (2011)
Best Performance by an Actor in a Supporting Role in a Series, Mini-Series or Motion Picture Made for Television
WINNER
Peter Dinklage for “Game of Thrones” (2011)
Other Nominees:
Paul Giamatti for Too Big to Fail (2011) (TV)
Guy Pearce for “Mildred Pierce” (2011)
Tim Robbins for Cinema Verite (2011) (TV)
Eric Stonestreet for “Modern Family” (2009)
Best Performance by an Actress in a Supporting Role in a Series, Mini-Series or Motion Picture Made for Television
WINNER
Jessica Lange for “American Horror Story” (2011)
Other Nominees:
Kelly Macdonald for “Boardwalk Empire” (2010)
Maggie Smith for “Downton Abbey” (2010)
Sofía Vergara for “Modern Family” (2009)
Evan Rachel Wood for “Mildred Pierce” (2011)
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